We are taught in life: grow up, get a job, and then get married, but nobody really coaches us on what a good marriage looks like or what’s required to have a successful marriage. Instead, we lead with our minds and what feels and looks good to us, our conditioned belief that love is obtained through others, when in reality unless we find love within, we will never find love outside. We go searching for love, approval, and acceptance outside of self and this eventually leaves us feeling bankrupt. That’s because we have been sold a false bill of goods, and we wonder why over 50% of marriages in the U.S. end in divorce.
How many times have you read in the tabloids that a marriage breaks up due to infidelity? Yes, that is a legitimate reason for a relationship to fail but what’s overlooked is the root cause driving the choice for infidelity. Usually, when you peel back all the layers and dig deep in pursuit of the truth, the act stems back to childhood. A false belief system about self, a lack of respect or confused perception of value; these hidden trapped emotions when left uncovered and not dealt with can cause havoc to any relationship.
Let’s examine the case of a child who grew up in a verbally abusive home. The child was told over and over that they weren’t good enough, they then internalize that, the experience is stored in their cellular memory bank and without even realizing the long-term effects that child grows up, gets married, and attracts a partner which displays disrespect to them; a reflection of where they are at with themselves and before you know it the relationship is filled with toxicity. The inability to communicate effectively grows and resentment builds. Their partner doesn’t feel valued because they have never learned to value and love themselves first. One of them becomes frustrated, meets someone else whom they feel values them more than their partner, one thing leads to another and before you know it, infidelity is suffocating their relationship. This is one of the tipping points that lead to divorce.
From there, the biggest remnant that follows the divorce is the need to find oneself, learning how to love and accept oneself during a time of upheaval. So where do you start? Is it possible to restore and resurrect from disaster? The answer is, “YES.” However, healing will require work and commitment on your part. But this is your chance to finally achieve self-acceptance, remove the masks you’ve been wearing and lay down all the hurts of the past that you’ve been carrying around. A time to break free from your conditioned thinking, an opportunity to connect within and uncover the superhero you’ve been designed to be. A time to turn in your victim card all while knowing that I am here for you and so are all the other authors in this book. We’ll help guide you on what to expect and mentor you so you can thrive instead of cry, exchanging beauty for ashes.
Connect How To Love And Accept Yourself After Divorce