It’s difficult enough to deal with our fear when we have no choice, when we do it out of pure necessity. Or when we do it because the prospect of staying where we are suddenly becomes scarier than the fear of moving on. But what happens when we don’t really NEED change anymore and when mastering our fears and taking action is completely optional?
Your life is pretty good. You are healthy, you are making enough money, your family is happy and you have a decent job. Your comfort zone is getting really cozy and comfortable. So you just stay there. But you know deep inside, that you have more to offer and more people in the world to serve, don’t you? You have that nagging sensation that this can’t be it. There must be more to your life.
But you are just not sure what to do. Can you actually ask for more when your life is good? And should you? You’ve been taught to be grateful for what you have. Sure, you’ve also been taught to achieve more, but you haven’t necessarily been told to WANT more. Isn’t it kind of presumptuous to assume that you can have it all, that you can be totally fulfilled and happy? And aren’t there others out there with bigger problems?
Here’s the thing though. Just because others around you might have less than you, it doesn’t mean that you are doing them a favor by having less as well. Just because you are striving to be happy, it doesn’t mean that someone else must be miserable. You are not stealing their happiness. You are not being considerate by holding back your life. You are not doing anybody a favor by settling for less than you want. Living small is not nicer or more appropriate than living big. Wanting more doesn’t automatically mean that you are ungrateful for what you already have. And let’s be clear; a bigger life doesn’t mean getting more stuff or more money (that may be a possible result, but hopefully not the end goal). It just means living with more purpose and intention, and bringing your talents, gifts and passions out to a larger group of people.
If anything, maybe THAT is actually what you owe it to the world to do?
But even when we know what we want and why we want it, we often don’t take action because of our fear of change. We perceive the risks involved to be much greater than that vague discomfort of settling. And when your life is good you have so much more to lose.
However, change is inevitable. It will happen whether you make an active choice or not. Even if you don’t act, it doesn’t mean you can safely hide there in your comfort zone and nothing will ever change again. You can still lose that job that you are kind of happy with, your husband or wife can still leave you and you can still get sick (God forbid). There are no guarantees in life, as we all know. So why would you settle for something less than what you want, when you could lose that too?
Doesn’t it make more sense to do as much as you possibly can? If you are lucky, it all works out, but if not, at least you tried and you will feel better and more confident for being brave enough to try. The risk isn’t bigger just because it’s something you want more. It can certainly feel that way sometimes. But there is no judgment process in the universe deciding that you can only be safe with the things that you don’t really want. The risk of change or loss is exactly the same whether you like something or you don’t.
And if you’re not even safe in your comfort zone, what’s the point of staying there?
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Originally published at www.facebook.com.
Originally published at medium.com