I’ve worked with numerous women who were smart, ambitious, and total go-getters.  Women who dreamed big, longing to manifest their deepest desires. Women who wanted to travel the world through their high-end services, go from secretary to CEO at their company, and women who were looking to find a relationship fit for a royal wedding. While their dreams varied in degree and style, one thing remained the same, these women were all blocking their potential. Phrases like “I’ll do it next year” and “I hope it will get better” to a flat out “I can’t,” kept these women trapped in hope-addicted realities and inevitably far from their dreams. 

I could relate, because I had once been there, too! 

But the question is, why do we do this? We know what we want but we allow the execution to fall short as we engage in self-sabotaging thoughts and behaviors.

In this article, I am sharing which self-sabotaging habits to look out for and how to overcome them. The art of transcending our circumstances and manifesting our most fabulous lives is done through what I call bending time and space. When we access this power by having deep knowledge that solutions beyond what we can see are always available to us and that we can fulfill our purpose now, the Universe can meet us there.

1.
Stop waiting for the right time. Have you ever found yourself in the trance of a delicious daydream only to be followed with a deep sigh and whispered “one day”? Because somehow you are sure that this big dream will manifest itself and that magically everything will fall into place one day. That the same things that are holding you back from having it now won’t be there any longer in this fictitious future. This is the hope addiction mindset that millions of people across the globe suffer from. Relying on hope alone numbs the pain of feeling stuck but also paralyzes us from taking action. The truth is there is never going to be a “right time” that will bring us to this destined one day. It will never feel like the perfect time to quit your job, file for a divorce, start a family, or go for that degree. By realizing this truth, you can see that the power of taking inspired action comes directly from you, the minute you have the courage to go for it. 

2.
You have what it takes. So now that you know the timeline to achieve your dreams is within your control, next comes the “but I don’t have what it takes” excuse.  Little do you know that you do in fact have what it takes. You assume you don’t since you’ve never tried before and your mind begins to future-trip thinking about all the ways you could possibly fail instead of all the ways you could succeed. Just because you haven’t ever taken action on this dream before doesn’t mean that you can’t or that you aren’t capable, it just means that you haven’t yet tried. When you put out the intention and take the actions to get where you want to go, the rest of the steps will reveal themselves to you.

3.
Beware of the Martyr. The Martyr is a subconscious archetype that lives within us, keeping our well-meaning selves exhausted on a treadmill of imagined duty, missing out on our epic lives. In the mind of the Martyr, every dream takes a backseat to the logistics- paying the bills, being responsible, taking care of everyone else, etc. The Martyr holds the belief that if he/she doesn’t do it then no one else will, keeping one locked into the fantasy of his/her future. It can be easy to allow this archetype to run the show, keeping us connected to security over spirituality. However, the choice is always yours. You can be the Martyr or you can be the King/Queen. You can play small or you can work miracles. 

When we become aware of these behaviors and thought patterns, understanding the ways in which we are procrastinating on our callings, we can make the necessary changes. The days of thinking so little of our capabilities, staying quiet about our desires, and turning a cheek to our dreams are over. It’s never too late or too soon to bend time and space and achieve the experiences you truly want. All it takes is you picking up your wand of confidence and courage and making it happen for yourself.