My fellow females some people will tell you to “fake it till you make it” when it comes to confidence. I’m not a big believer in that theory, and I will explain why in more detail below.

Allow yourself to be your true authentic self and celebrate how wonderful you are each and every day. Each day gives you another opportunity to give yourself credit for how unique and individual you are and how capable you are in life.

So why do women need to stop faking it?

It’s as simple as we already have within us what we need to succeed in our life we just need to bring it to the surface.

So how do we gain the courage and confidence to be our true authentic self and shine authentically?

We have to reconnect with our strengths and qualities that help us feel confident by uniting with our unique support systems and disconnecting from our weakened distortions of our reality. We all have them the inner chatterbox the voice in our head that says “you can’t” or starts encouraging us to evaluate and compare our measure of success based on someone else’s reality. Remember chasing someone else’s dream, or material success will leave us feeling miserable, inadequate and lacking, even more, confidence.

How can we reconnect to disconnect?

Here are two simple strategies for you to try and start rebuilding natural confidence from within.

1.Identify the triggers that lower your confidence and work on a reverse strategy. 
What do I feel? 
What do I say to myself? 
How do I behave?

2.Change your mindset and enable more confidence by asking yourself
How would I be without this thought?
What would it look like for me?
What would I think instead? 
What would I do instead?

When we start removing negative thoughts, and beliefs, we become our real confident, authentic self. Get up, show up and be present in that best-dressed outfit that is natural self-confidence. Building it takes time, but if we start today, we will develop a muscle that will propel us onto great things in life, and we will no longer need to fake anything.

Confidence is like a muscle the more you use it, the stronger it gets.

Originally published at


  • Pauline Harley

    I Help Bored Mid Career Professionals and Executives Transition with Confidence, Clarity and Candour

    I listen to and write real-life stories that connect mid-career professionals and executives with their value-driven purpose. I've had the pleasure of working with Executives, VP's, Directors and Mid to Late Seasoned Career Professionals worldwide to prepare exit strategies and change careers. I help my clients to: 1. Find the next challenge in their career 2. Transition out of an executive role 3. Achieve a sense of whole self and impact in their newfound career 4. Find the courage to make a career change, following redundancy or retirement and prepare an exit strategy