Growing up and until recently I’ve had anger issues. Which means I have overreacted on a multitude of occasions to minor situations. I haven’t physically attacked or hurt anyone but I’m sure that I’ve left a number of people emotionally impacted by my actions.
As an adult, I had assumed that it was beyond my control and something that was probably hereditary…my mother and father have what I consider to be anger issues. Again, not physically violent but emotionally violent. However, this was an excuse to hide the character flaws that kept a door open for my reactions to be consistently inappropriate.
Another problem was that I was always relying on an external fix to address my character issues. There were innumerable vices that offered temporary solace after one of my many rants…none have ever sufficed. What I didn’t realize is the power that I have in this situation. Instead of putting myself in a position of powerlessness, I began clearly delineating the situations in my life that I have control over and those situations where I had no control. This is an ongoing exercise that has to be done consistently.
Once I recognized that I have control over this particular situation (my anger), I then began to look to internal resources to help alleviate this issue. On the flip side of my anger issues is a patience that I would consider prodigious. If I choose to replace my anger with this patience that I don’t use enough…it will and has had a significant impact on those in my life…and me. This is NOT an overnight scenario. It requires practice. I’ve spent my life battling anger issues…it will take time for that mode of thinking and reacting to be replaced with something much healthier for me and those around me.