Midlife can be messy, jarring, brilliant, confusing, distressing, and freeing—all at the same time. It’s definitely not for sissies. But let’s face it, life has always been messy and beautiful and everything in between. You came into this life for the adventure of it. To experience ALL of it. And now, you’re 40ish (50ish, 60ish, 70ish…or beyond). Life is changing. Life is change…again, and again, and again.

We live in a culture that glorifies youth. The media perpetuates the illusion that age seems to have become a problem to be dealt with rather than a natural part of life to be celebrated and embraced.

What if all the questioning, restlessness and wondering, and the discontent we experience in midlife is really a powerful invitation to step into more?  It is, my friend, it is!

Brené Brown says it beautifully in The Gifts of Imperfection;

People may call what happens in midlife ‘a crisis’, but it’s not. It’s an unraveling – a time when you feel a desperate pull to live the life you want to live not theone you’re ‘supposed’ to live.

Brené Brown

Midlife is that wake-up call to stop trying to fit into small boxes and tired old ideas about life, and aging, and to flourish in new, creative, and exciting ways.  We are meant to become more, not less, as we enter the second half of our lives. We are here to grow, learn, evolve, and that doesn’t end because we’ve reached a certain age. It is actually the opposite.

Midlife is your time to flourish

Flourishing is a sacred practice. It invites you to look within yourself for those places calling for your love and attention. It’s a loving practice about learning to embrace the lines, the grays, the restlessness, and the fears, and to learn to relax into your life. It’s your call to accept what is, surrender the struggle, the hustle, the striving, and let life live itself through you.

Acceptance and surrender are not about giving up or giving in. They are the doorway to truly seeing yourself, perhaps for the very first time, as the beautiful, powerful and amazingly wise woman you are!  Acceptance and surrender invite you to trust your inner guidance–that deep and mighty inner wisdom—and navigate life and any challenges you may face with grace knowing that life is always supporting you.

As a Certified Life Coach working with midlife women, I’ve discovered that there are many ways a woman can flourish in midlife. Though every woman has her own unique energy and way of navigating life, I’ve found 12 ways that I hold sacred.  As you read through them, feel free to take those that feel right to you and to add your own.  

Flourishing in midlife is to…

  1. Tune out the noise of the world and turn within so you can hear your inner guidance.
  2. Allow yourself to visualize the future you want and become that version of yourself—now—no more waiting!
  3. Let go of what you have no control over and be fully response-able for your thoughts, feelings, choices, and how you move in the world.
  4. Notice your thoughts and change those that don’t support the life you want to live.
  5. Accept your perfectly imperfect self completely with no defending, criticizing, judging, blaming, or demeaning.
  6. Ask for what you want in life and trust you are abundantly supplied in all ways.
  7. Allow yourself to feel and process your feelings no matter what they are knowing those feelings guide you through life.
  8. Risk being seen and heard, being vulnerable, in all your relationships.
  9. Slow down and be fully present in each moment.
  10. Listen deeply to others without taking responsibility for their challenges.
  11. Have and hold clear boundaries around your energy, time, attention and space.
  12. When you speak to yourself like someone you love—because YOU are the beloved.

This is YOUR life.  You get to decide how you want to live it, who you are and what you want to believe about yourself.

Let go of who you think you’re supposed to be and live into the fullness of who you truly are. You are powerful, beautiful, wise, and amazing and you are meant to flourish at every age and stage of life. 

It’s time to redefine midlife on your own terms.