Are you ‘always sick?’ or do you just feel like it’s ‘one thing after another?’ These are some of the giveaways that you could be neglecting your mental wellbeing

Your mind is the single-handed most powerful tool you have to work with in your life. However, if you’re like most people, you probably have no idea that if you’re not using it right, it can be your worst enemy and affect your mental wellbeing.

So, what are some of the tell-tale signs that you need to take better care of your mental wellbeing?

  1. You regularly have a physical illness
  2. One of your physical spaces is in a mess i.e. career, relationship, finances, home, studio, car etc
  3. You are constantly busy and/or tired
  4. You keep attracting less than favourable situations
  5. You spend most of your time anxious, stressed, unhappy etc

Any of these sound familiar? Let’s dig a little deeper….

Do you regularly have a physical illness?

If you are ill on a regular basis, then this is a huge clue that there is some stuff you need to unravel in your mind. Here’s the crack. Everything is connected and your mind and body are no different. Your mind controls your body, so it makes sense that if your body isn’t in great health that your mind is at the root of it. Not quite convinced of the power of your mind over your body? Try this out…

Think of your favourite food right now. Whether it’s a dish from Nobu or Nandos, imagine eating it, the texture, the taste and savouring the explosion of flavours in your mouth….now answer this. Is your mouth watering? If you really did it, then of course it is! Your mind can’t distinguish between real and imagined so whether or not you’re actually eating it, your body will still respond in the same way. This is the power of your thoughts over your body.

Now, I’m not a doctor or a health professional, however, it has been proven scientifically many times that physical illness is rooted in unresolved emotional issues. Repressed anger is considered by many health and wellness professionals to be among the most toxic emotions and a significant contributing factor to chronic physical pain…So, if you can gain proper control of your mind, thoughts and thinking, you can overcome any illness. Medication will often help to ease your physical symptoms, however, it’s not treating the root cause.

If you want to truly free yourself of illness, the answer lies within you. So, what is it that you’re holding on to? What do you need to let go of? What fear do you need to overcome? And, what will happen when you chose to deal with it?

Is there a physical space in your life that’s a mess?

It’s likely that you’ve been taught that the things that show up in your outer game just are. You know, the whole kind of ‘it is what is type of thing.’ If your relationships are a mess, you more than likely think it’s the other person’s fault, if your finances are a mess (despite how much money you’re earning) you believe it to be because you’re not earning enough, or some other reason, and if you’re home or workspace is a mess, you probably have some ‘reason’ for that being your truth. Yes, Marie Kondo can definitely help you to tidy up your physical spaces – and you should.

However, the real truth, the core of your physical space being a mess lies in your mental space, somewhere in what I call your inner game. All of the ‘mess’ outside of you is just a symptom – similar to the physical symptoms you get when you’re ill. As I explained above, treating the symptoms alone isn’t enough. Your physical world is a mess because it’s reflecting what’s going on inside of you, in your mind. Put another way, if you’re not looking after your mental wellbeing, then that’s going to be reflected in your physical world. The things that show up in your life are just a reflection of what’s going on inside of you.

So within. So without.

In order to transform your outer game results, you have to get to the root cause of it all and that my friend is an inside job! By changing the thoughts you think, you change the feelings you feel, the vibrations you live in and therefore the results you get in your life.

Are you constantly busy and/or tired?

When you’re non-stop ALL of the damn time, making yourself busy even when you don’t need to be on and you’re  just finding things for you to do so you’re not alone and you don’t have to ‘think,’ this is a clear sign that there’s something going on inside of you that you need to deal with. Contrary to popular belief, it’s not ‘cool’ to be busy all of the time. You’re not a machine, made to run non-stop and if you choose to keep living your life that way, at some point, your body and/or your mind will break down, forcing you to stop. And then what?

Creating things to keep you busy all the time is nothing more than a fear-based way of living and a distraction technique. It’s also a way of denying yourself what you truly, really need and only serves to delay the inevitable of needing to deal with whatever the root issue is for you. Believe me, I tried this way of living and being and I can tell you that no matter how fast you run, how long you run, or how busy you make your life, at some point or another, whatever it is you need to deal with will catch up with you and you will HAVE to deal with it. So why not now?

What will happen when you choose to release whatever it is you’re trying so hard to run from? How much more energy will you have to give in other areas of your life? How much better will your mental health and wellbeing be for it?

Do you keep attracting less than favourable situations?

Do you find yourself wondering things like ‘why does this always happen to me?’ No matter what you do, how many changes you make, you still end up having the same experiences of your life? Most people can relate to this in relationships and if you’re familiar with Katie Price and Kerry Katona, they are prime examples of this. So, they’re in a relationship, for whatever reason it doesn’t work out, they part ways and move on. They get with someone else. All seems to be going well for a while and then that relationship ends. Then they move on again into yet another relationship and I’ll leave you to solve what happens next. So, why does this keep on happening? This is because the issue isn’t with the partner chosen (something outside of them) what needs to be changed is something within them.

But, these two women aren’t ‘special cases.’ This kind of pattern runs in most people’s lives. We all understand the definition of insanity – doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result. However, very rarely, if ever is this thought about in terms of people’s thoughts (mind) feelings and emotions, nor the impact it has on their life and their mental wellbeing.

If you don’t correct the thinking patterns that are running your life, let go of the baggage of the past hurt and pain and basically do the inner work, then nothing outside of you will change. It can’t because it goes against the laws of the Universe.

In order to change anything outside of you permanently and for it to be sustainable in a healthy way, you have to change what’s going on inside of you, the cycles running inside of you creating your life and in this example, creating the unfavourable circumstances and events. Everything always starts with you.

Do you spend most of your time anxious, stressed, unhappy etc?

If this is you, know that your life does not have to be that way. Contrary to what you probably believe at some level of your being, stress, anxiety and being unhappy are not pre-requisites of life.

As you are now fully aware of having read this far in this article, if you are experiencing any of these ‘symptoms’ in your life, it is a manifestation of some thoughts going on inside of you. These thoughts could be buried deep in your mind at a subconscious level, and it is your subconscious mind – the part of your mind that runs on autopilot – that is in the driver’s seat of your life and is responsible for 95% of your behaviour. You don’t have to be a genius at math to know that that equals a HUGE chunk of your life! And as I shared with you earlier, your thoughts drive your feelings, actions and results and all of these affect your mental wellbeing.

Usually, these thoughts are set up in childhood, so if you think back to how that was for you, you may find your root cause. For me, I grew up in an environment of volatility, feeling like I was walking on eggshells which created fear, and also experienced scarcity and lack, so it’s little wonder that I unconsciously recreated these same vibrations throughout my life until I learnt to break the cycle.

The bottom line is that whatever is going on for you (whether or not you are fully on board with what I’m sharing,) your mind is where it’s at. As the ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu once shared, “when you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall into place.”

This has been a whistlestop tour of 5 common telltale signs that your mental wellbeing needs some TLC. If you relate to any of these, first off, don’t beat yourself up! That’s definitely not good for any part of your wellbeing! We all do the best we can with who we are and what we know. I have shared these signs with you so that you can shine a light on what’s not been working for you and because awareness is one of the first steps to change – you can’t change something if you don’t know it’s an issue for you. So, what’s critical for you to resolve, right now?

Jade Stoner is The Entertainer’s Life Coach and Founder of Success Boutique by Jade Stoner, a brand dedicated to transforming the minds of music, film, TV and sport professionals so they can overcome the internal struggle that so many of them experience with their fame. Get complimentary access to her audio ‘8 Hacks to Transform Your Inner Game’ now