“Wow, you look really confident,” said no one ever. Confidence is a quality that everyone can see and notice when you have it, but when asked how to get it, the answer is usually silence with a shrug of the shoulders. Confident people seem like they were born with some sort of safeguard against all fears and anxieties. They not only look like they know what they’re doing, but their body language and actions reflect the confidence in them.
A lot of people think that you are either born confident or if you aren’t, there’s nothing you can do to be more social. But actually there are things you can do to increase how much confidence you have.
Here are 5 ways to naturally boost your confidence:
1. Know That the More You Talk the More Confident You Will Be
Sometimes, what you think crushes your ability to actually talk in social situations. Anxiety has a way of tricking you into thinking that everyone is looking at you or that by saying one wrong word you will end up looking like a fool. These anxieties and fears come from the assumption that you aren’t confident, when in reality it’s just normal nerves that everyone feels.
But the more you talk and become less self-conscious about what other people think of you, the more confident you start to feel. The reason for this is because you realize the worst case scenario isn’t as bad as you thought. You start to think that everyone is too busy worrying about themselves than they are focused on you.
So, next time anxiety starts creeping up on your mind, take a deep breath and say something. Use those “feelings” as energy and go up to that cute girl or guy and introduce yourself. The more you do it, the better you’ll feel about it.
If talking in social situations is your issue, check out some of our other articles on talking to people here .
2. Practice Makes Perfect
Confidence isn’t something that just randomly hits you one day. It takes time and effort to achieve it. You obviously try your hardest at everything you pursue, so why wouldn’t you do the same for something that is going to help you in every aspect of your life?
Unfortunately, when most people think of practice they tend to think about boring homework from grade school. But socializing can be a fulfilling form of practice, and it’s fun. Exercising your social muscles will not only make you more confident, but it will also help you with your future endeavors and careers because all of them require some form of socializing.
So instead of playing video games tonight, try talking to a stranger or inviting that cute girl from class out for coffee.
3. Focus on Others
When you spend too much time focusing on yourself or your problems, everything else can easily fall out of place. Your mental and emotional well-being is the most important thing in your life; without it, all other areas will begin to crumble.
So when thinking about how to be more confident, focus more on others. If you are at a social gathering where you don’t know anyone, introduce yourself to one person and make them feel like the most interesting person in the world. Then continue to do that with everyone else there until it becomes a habit.
4. Fake It Until You Make It
A big part of being confident is looking confident. When you look like someone who is confident, people are more drawn to you because it shows that you are in control of your life. You don’t have to be the most good looking guy or girl out there, but if you project confidence then people will see that and pick up on it.
It’s important to note though… faking confidence can be a tricky subject. You don’t want to completely change who you are just to make other people like you. If that means staying at home and not going out until you build up your confidence, then by all means do it.
5. Love Yourself
If you have ever been told that self-confidence comes from within, they were 100% right. No amount of compliments from others can ever replace the confidence that you have in yourself on the inside. If you don’t love yourself, then it’s hard for anyone else to love you either.
You first need to realize that every single person is beautiful and worthy of love, because everyone has some sort of beauty within them. If you don’t see your own beauty, then start looking at others and what they do such as their hobbies or personalities. It will help you realize that everyone is unique in their own way and that there really isn’t a “perfect” person out there.