That’s a clear indication to walk away and find new people who appreciate you.

Originally published Medium

Life is a journey and a constant process for growth. I came across the following quote the other day: 

“Real growth is when you start checking & correcting yourself. Instead of blaming others, you take responsibility for your decisions!”

Truer words have never been spoken. None of us are perfect, but we all have the potential to choose when to change toxic patterns that we know, or have been told by our loved ones (those who really matter and have been telling you multiple times of a certain behaviour you should work on.) When we are aligned with our true selves, we can recognize the bad, and take the first few steps to dismantle and grow into a better you. 

We are all a working process so don’t rush your inner creative work, and be kind. Be grateful that you at least have people tell you when you’re being an a** or that you are wrong. It’s okay to make mistakes, because that’s how you grow. Nobody gets to personally develop without going through difficult situations. Trust me – I’ve learned this the hard way. Which is why I’m begging you to look from within and work on your inner darkness, and not blame the world or hurt the people you love because you cannot deal with your own toxic and unhealed behaviours. If you don’t have anything that you think you need to work on, then there is the possibility that you need to do some self-reflection.

This culture and era we are living in has brought that to light too. We are all struggling, and connected. But also, we have developed more narcissistic personality disorder traits that are rooted in our genes since colonialism. However, it is being disguised by the media, news, movies, and all social media universes. You may have your own opinion of if you think that’s true or not. But again, a narcissistic is always right, and they always have ways to distort reality. Here is a little bit of information for you to take your time and educate yourself. Also, here is how it’s associated with systemic racism, environmental racism, slavery, inequality, individualism, and sexism during a world pandemic. 

Here are 5 ways to begin to dismantle the idea of normal that you have to fit in a “society or for narcissistic individuals”, rather than just work on getting better yourself; emotionally, physically, spiritually, and most importantly right now, financially. Let’s help each other out and grow out of what “society” and this toxic culture is trying to keep us in so others that are privileged and wealthy can still benefit from our struggles and insecurities. Let’s focus on our minds, and becoming a better human for our better future selves and those who come after us. Let me know if you have more to add into the following list in the comments.

  1. Stop comparing yourself to others.
  2. Take accountability for your actions and decisions. Blaming others is a toxic waste of time and space. Also, it’s a colonized mindset.
  3. Ignore negative people, vibes, and environment. Personal growth and a healthy mindset requires separation.
  4. “It’s not personal, it’s just business “. Do you ever wonder why when you hear these words that your subconscious always gives you a brief image in your mind, or feeling in your soul of being colonized. I don’t know if my white people see that when you use or hear the phrase. But I know people of color, or those who have been marginalized, oppressed, all see it and feel that way. That’s why we are honouring our ancestors for all the bs that we’ve been through for 500 years. If this bothers you, check your privilege.
  5. Use creativity through adversity and believe in yourself no matter what.

Remember, you are loved, you are your spouse and your best friend to yourself first.

That’s your first commitment. Because you have to deal with yourself from the moment you wake up until you sleep. And this life is not long, and we don’t know what happens to us when we die. So make sure you are doing good on this side while you are still alive; that people love you and remember you are as a good, happy, and loving person. Not by being an a**hole who made money all his life, but his/her family hated them, had no friends and nobody showed up to their funeral. That’s rough. Nobody remembers the a**wipe who spent their life making others miserable. Nobody cares if you had a billion dollars in your bank account, or a mansion, or own an island. Nobody cares for materialistic crap you possess because those don’t matter. Lives Matter. HUMANITY RIGHTS MATTER. 

 Values, integrity, honesty, kindness, compassion, love and how you treat people is what people remember. Not what you own. So remember that next time you decide to judge, gaslight or bully people just because their realness bothers you. Next time, ask yourself why it bothers you before you tell someone “you are not normal”. Heck yeah! That’s a good thing. By being different, you are living and you are free. What’s wrong with that? When did we make it a crime for a person to be not following the crowd and not conforming with the status quo? Keep in mind that there are the who/why some benefits from us not being our authentic selves. 

Hope this helps, stay safe, wear your masks, be kind to your planet, to YOU and to OTHERS. 

Remember we are still raising money for Lebanon, Beirut. The first 10,000 will go to Save the Children Lebanese Relief Fund. Here is why.

Here is the link: (Donate here)

Thank you for your support!

Love and Light,


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Edited by EP❤

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