I have been recording a series for my YouTube channel on the all the questions you ask at the end of an Emotionally Abusive Relationship; I believe knowledge is power and when you can understand what has been happening this is your first step on your healing journey.
Unless you are a survivor of emotional abuse, you have no idea what it means to fight a daily battle in your head, with a person you are no longer in contact with.
The constant conversations you have with yourself and the questions you keep asking.
I know what I was asking, but when I did any research, questions were along the lines of wanting to understand what they are doing and if you are being missed. Why?
Oh that is so simple because your self-esteem is on the floor, they told you that you were the only person who has ever understood them, so how have they moved on? Why aren’t you good enough anymore? What did you do wrong?
Each relationship is different, but the cycles are the same. And when I work with people and ask them a question, they automatically deny anything and protect themselves or the memory; however, as we progress they open up and acknowledge a childhood trauma or an abandonment wound.
And it is this trauma or wound that is your verruca! It’s your virus…
We know a virus isn’t good; one has just cost me £££ to remove it from my laptop! And, if we have a virus in our body it knock us out, there is nothing you can do but rest and keep hydrated.
Do they miss me? There is a pain deep inside you; where do you feel that pain? Perhaps you are wondering if you meant anything to them.
The pain might be from feeling rejected or abandoned.
Do they miss you? • No, they don’t, and they probably don’t even think about you.
Too harsh? • I’m sorry I don’t want to hurt you even further… But it is true.
Maybe they are thinking about you but not for the same reasons.
They might be devaluing you to other people, creating stories and smear campaigns to make them look like the victim. They were doing it before they left so it wasn’t such a shock to others and they needed the supply of attention.
They may be ‘getting off’ on seeing how much pain you are in, they love to know how much power they still have over you.
They may miss the things you did for them and the attention (the good quality) they received from you. They will have already started to talk about you to their new partner, just like they did to you. They are programming them to receive the information they need to stay in their fake relationship.
They might be hoovering you making you think they really do care.
The sad truth is, this is a game and you don’t have the rules, you never did and you never will.
The sad truth is, they are doing exactly the same with someone new.
Where is the pain coming from? If you can feel it in your chest or perhaps your head is spinning, this is where the root of your verruca is, this is where your ORIGINAL WOUND is.