Learning to like yourself is one of the most challenging tasks that we can undertake as individuals. It is also one of the most important. We must like ourselves in order to enjoy our lives. Additionally, whether we like ourselves (or not) influences whether others like us too.

Our past experiences, history, and interactions all shape our views on self-worth. The more negativity we’ve encountered, the worse we may feel about ourselves. And our internal viewpoint has a significant impact on many different areas of our lives. Therefore, we should actively work to improve our mindsets so that we not only like ourselves, but so that we truly love ourselves.

In order to grow in self-love, you should:  

  • Forgive yourself.  Don’t beat yourself up over things that you have done wrong (mistakes, failures, and setbacks). No one is perfect so learn to forgive yourself and keep evolving.  
  • Let go of the past. Everyone has a past. Keep that past in the rearview mirror where it belongs. Turn your attention to your current actions, feelings and thoughts instead. They say more about you and how far you’ve come.
  • Phone a friend. If you feel your self-worth spiraling downward, call a friend that always lifts you up and boosts your self-esteem. Other people can tell you about all of your wonderful qualities when you can’t tell yourself.
  • Focus on the positives. We often spend our time thinking and worrying about the negatives. We should, in fact, be focusing on the positives so that we may retrain our brain to look for the good in ourselves and our lives.
  • Take notes. Keep a journal to document how you’re talking to yourself. If you are being too self-critical, try to rephrase what you’re saying to compliment yourself instead.
  • Change what you don’t like. If there is something that you really don’t like about yourself, do what you can to change it. Maybe it involves taking some courses, giving yourself a makeover, or becoming more social. Whatever it is, make a goal and start working towards it.
  • Lean into what you do like. Focus on those things that you really do like about yourself. Maybe it’s your smile, sense of humor, or style. Maybe it’s your ability to keep calm during challenges. Remind yourself of the things that you admire and really lean in.


  • Charlene Walters, MBA, PhD

    Author, Corporate Trainer, Business Mentor, Consultant

    Charlene Walters, MBA, PhD, LLC

    Charlene Walters, MBA, PhD is business mentor, higher education and writing consultant, corporate trainer (Charlene Walters, MBA, PhD, LLC) and author of Launch Your Inner Entrepreneur (McGraw Hill). She is also the host of Launch, a TV show which streams on Amazon Fire, AppleTV and Roku (D B TV), and an expert on Quora's Business, Education and Society spaces. Additionally, Charlene teaches business and entrepreneurship courses at UCONN and the University of Alaska, was selected as one of 150 Marketers to Follow by Rubicly, and is featured among other CEOs, influencers and celebrities on the BAM Network.