How to Find Power from Fabulous and Sassy-Licious Drag Queens

“Walking with your chest out and your head held high says you have earned the right to stomp and pummel this particular piece of real estate.” 
― RuPaul


  Growing up and watching Disney’s Cinderella, I longed to have a fairy godmother to transform me. With the assistance of fairy godmothers, young lead females can morph from everyday frumps to gorgeous socialites. These women not only find their Prince Charming, but eventually find that their beauty, strength, or magic exists within and not from without.   

            In the annual British holiday pantomimes, one of the lead roles is generally played by a drag queen character.  It doesn’t matter if the play is Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, or Beauty and The Beast. A lead is in drag.  These are performances meant to entertain the entire family.  It’s not looked at as peculiar, or even trendy.  It’s actually simply the norm. People rejoice and sing along to the beloved plays that are splashed with familiar pop songs. 

            Drag Queens are fascinating and engaging.  They carry this sense power in their over the top personalities.  There are no apologies for having out of this world alter egos.  All is embraced.  We have so much to learn from exploring this world.  And so I slowly dipped into it.

            This year, I have caved in and began watching RuPaul’s Drag Race on Netflix.  Although, the show is currently in it’s 11thseason, I haven’t watched it until now.  What lured me in is one of the top contestants was a friend from high school.  He was actually a date to one of my high school dances.   I saw her once in our 20s perform in Nina’s adopted hometown of Columbus Ohio, and ever since then I’ve been watching Nina West from my social media updates, and I can’t help but burst with pride in seeing an old classmate glam it up with Lady Gaga, Adele, or to be given a shout out by Sia.  And now s“he’s on RuPaul.

            As I watch Nina and her colleagues compete it out each week, I can’t help but be fascinated by their confidence.   They strut their stuff down the runways, blurt out how fabulous they are, and are completely theatrical in their clothes, makeup, and facial expressions. I had taken burlesque classes this past year, and what we are trying to exemplify are basically drag queens…alter egos, confident walks, free style dance moves, intoxicating gazes, creative and unique costumes.  There’s one more similarity between these types of shows.  The most beautiful part about going to both drag and burlesque shows is the supportive audience.

            It takes vulnerability and courage to express yourself (even if it is your alter ego) on stage. All forms of beauty are appreciated. We want those onstage to succeed. Live it up for us.  The bigger your confidence, the more intoxicating the performance.  Watching a powerful queen on stage, acts as fairy dust for the audience.  The show reminds us that we too have this fierce power and unencumbered beauty within.  If they can access it, so can we.

            I know I’m not the only one to make this claim.  This year’s film Dumplin featured the lead character, Willowdean, as a slightly overweight, self-deflating high schooler whose mother was beauty pageant queen Jennifer Anniston.   Willowdean learned to find power and strength from two particular aspects: Dolly Parton and Dolly Parton drag queens. They physically showed her to exude femininity, presence, and power through mentoring her during the film.  

            As I continue to watch RuPaul’s Drag Race season and root for Nina West, I am realizing perhaps the fairy drag-mother is not a fictional concept.  She may actually exist.  Through watching her perform, I know that the magic bottle of confidence, beauty, sass, and strength is available from within.  

“If You Can’t Love Yourself How In The Hell Are You Gonna Love Somebody Else?”-RuPaul


  • Dr. Tricia

    Creativity Coach, Author, Psychologist, Yogini, and Community Wellness Consultant

    Tricia immerses herself in the world of helping others live passionately in the present moment. For the past several years, she has been working with the USAF Special Forces overseas as a clinical psychologist, consultant, workshop facilitator, and yoga instructor. She has published her first book The Fragrance of Wanderlust: How to Capture the Essence of Travel in Our Everyday Lives. In the meantime, check out her weekly podcast The Golden Mirror.