According to Rony Ross, founder of Panorama Software, the secret to successful negotiating is taking the ego out of the equation. Early in her career, she developed this strategy to aid her in negotiating. Using fear to dominate the boardroom has been a tactic as old as time in negotiation. The no-nonsense, commanding demeanor has squashed many deals, leaving them to flop about on the conference table like a proverbial fish gasping for air.

At first glance, it would appear that the fearless leader is filled with confidence and completely self-assured that everyone will agree to their terms, and that the closing will result in an internal touchdown dance. However, if you look closer, this seemingly unafraid dealmaker is really just an improvising deal breaker because they do not have a plan in hand.

So in short ego equals fear. This ultimately gives way to panic and apprehension, which then breeds an acceptance of terms that were not really all that agreeable in the first place. It is important to note that ambition and assertiveness have their time and place, but at the negotiation table, it is interpreted as egotistical and aggressive.

By keeping the negotiation focused on results rather than the people involved, the deal becomes less hostile and more approachable. It is very easy to take things personally – especially considering that most negotiations depend on placing a value on a product or the one that is providing it.

With a negotiation strategy in hand, the process can go more smoothly and all can walk away with what they were after. Many are afraid of negotiating for a variety of reasons. Maybe it’s a lack of preparation, not understanding the process or they can’t bring themselves to ask for what they want in fear that they will be turned down.

A few things to keep in mind regarding negotiation is that one is expected to negotiate. Walking in believing that all they have to offer will be readily accepted is absurd. Practicing and preparation is another helpful tip. Lastly, implementing a strategy will help one to achieve what they are asking for out of the deal. When fear keeps one from asking for what they want, the answer will always be no.

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