Those who understand the secret to success know that everything in life that manifests first begins with having a vision in mind. Think about the career you have, the car you drive, or your family dynamics. More than likely, those things came into fruition based on the thoughts and visions you held in your mind. In my experience as a family lawyer in Bergen County NJ, I have found that it can help clients to negotiate effectively with their spouses by establishing a vision first. 

Walt Disney once said, “Imagination is the key to life’s coming attractions.” The ability to turn a mental image into something that is tangible is powerful and takes a lot of patience. I remember speaking with a client who had been attempting to get her husband to take a cruise with her. He was afraid of drowning, which caused him to ultimately become fearful of cruising along the Caribbean with his wife. 

This went on for a year. However, being the tenacious woman my client was, she was determined to spend her 25th anniversary on a cruise to the Bahamas with the love of her life. 

One night, she initiated a visualization exercise and asked her husband to close his eyes, breathe deeply, and envision himself on the cruise. Initially, he was hesitant. My client told me she kept repeating the words, “You’re safe. You’re happy. You’re loved” over and over until her husband finally surrendered. 

Long story short…they took their cruise to the Bahamas, had an exceptional time, and they’re anticipating their next cruise one day in the near future. If my client had not incorporated a visualization practice on her husband, they probably wouldn’t have had the experience of a lifetime. 

You can also experience a successful negotiation through visualizing with your spouse. Here are 5 ways to make that happen:

  1. Ask pertinent questions to determine how they feel about the situation.

2. Based on their response, determine if it’s a fear-based or logical answer.

3. Ask your spouse to visualize the positive outcome, while also validating their feelings.

4. Be willing to weigh all options before making a final decision. 

5. When you make your decision, don’t waver on it. Stick to the idea that first came to mind when you started visualizing.

Ultimately, visualization is impactful when both parties involved believe things will manifest. It is not a practice that one should become skeptical about. It may be difficult in the beginning to remain positive during the process – especially if this is your first time. But, through consistency, you will master visualization and your efforts at negotiating with your spouse should be more successful over time. 


This article contains general information and opinions from Sheena Burke Williams and is not intended to be a source of legal advice for any purpose. No reader of this article should act or refrain from acting on the basis of information included in this article without seeking legal advice of counsel. Sheena Burke Williams expressly disclaims all liability with respect to actions taken or not taken based on any content in this article.