Did you ever say to yourself, “I would change (fill in the blank) right now but it’s just too late”? We all have reasons why we think it’s too late to change something. We tell ourselves the reasons in our mind and then we act as if that is the unmalleable truth. What makes it too late? If you want to change professions, is it too late because you are already trained in something that you know (even though you dislike doing it) and you feel that’s all you know how to do? Is it too late to go back to school or start a new business because you have too many responsibilities to take on a change that may take time to implement? Is it too late to change something about yourself because you are so set in your ways? Is it too late to change the way you view the world because you’re “too old”? Is it too late to feel better about yourself and your life because you are “stuck” with what you have? I can ask this question many more ways. Suffice it to say that telling yourself it’s too late to change does just that. It makes it too late to change.
One thing is for certain. Everything you tell yourself becomes a “fact”, whether it’s true or not. Now I will never say to you that change is easy. It’s not. It requires a lot of self-reflection, commitment and fortitude. And, of course, time. But the important question to ask yourself is, “Am I happy with myself, my circumstances, my job, my life experience? If the answer is no, you need to understand a very important point. If YOU do not change those issues, they will not change. We have all been blessed with life and there are two ways you can experience it. One is as a passenger on a sailboat with no Captain and no known destination, floating aimlessly at sea, sailing to wherever the wind blows you. The other is as the Captain, charting a course and steering to where you want to go.
Oh? So you’ve never steered your ship before? You have no idea how to do that so how could you even contemplate it? Or is it that you are just afraid to steer the ship for fear of doing the wrong thing, choosing the wrong direction and making a mess out of things? It is so much easier to do nothing and remain unfulfilled, unhappy and disappointed with yourself or your circumstances than taking a chance on change. But there is only one guarantee in this life. Accepting things as they are cements them into your life. Pushing those burning desires away does not bring them to you. Without conscious desire and action, you will remain stuck.
Is it really too late? Or is that just an excuse you tell yourself so as not to step outside of your comfort zone? As a doctor who has been in practice for nearly 40 years, specializing in treating patients with chronic foot and ankle pain, I have learned a lot about human behavior from my patients. Treating these people revealed to me that when lifestyle changes were desperately needed to help them get well, I was met with basically 2 types of reactions to my recommendations. One was “It’s too late. I’m too old, or I’m too set in my ways to change my diet, to exercise, to change my habits, etc.”. The other was “Ok doc. I’m really motivated to feel better and I’m going to do what you are recommending”. The first group included people of all ages, from their 20s to their 90s. But, so did the second group! That’s right. Patients as old as 70, 80, 90 were willing to change things if it meant feeling better and improving their life experience. See my point? There were many young people who sabotaged their healing by their limiting belief that it was too late to change and many older people who did not limit their chances of healing by embracing change. It’s a mindset.
What we are really talking about here is not age, circumstance, responsibility, finances, etc. What we are talking about is motivation. With motivation, you can change anything. Even your own lack of self-esteem can change. Don’t believe me? I’m living proof. My early life was full of self-doubt, low self-esteem, lack of love and acceptance and my outer life reflected ALL of that. Nothing went “my” way. I saw myself as a victim of circumstance who just had to “suck it up”. But finally, I got to the point where I had enough misery. My breaking point is what motivated me to change. Guess what? None of those issues rule my life anymore. Was it easy? No. Was it quick? No. Was it uncomfortable? Yes. Was it all success and no failures? No! Was the work I put into changing worth it? ABSOLUTELY! It is never too late to be happy, to create positive changes that have a profound effect on your happiness and life experience. Never! In addition to my medical practice, I am also a motivational life coach. I could have easily said to myself, “What am I doing this now for? It’s too late. I’m too old. But I have learned to respond to what motivates me and I am deeply motivated to help others, especially those whose experience is like mine used to be.
Don’t know where or how to get started? Can’t get out of your own way? A motivational life coach may be the very thing you need to become the Captain of your ship!
Dr. Robert Kornfeld is a life coach and holistic podiatrist based in NYC and Long Island. He is the Founder of Change Your Story Coaching (www.changeyourstorycoaching.com) and assists people on their journey to making their dream life happen. Sign up for his email list and get all of his timely and informative articles in your inbox. Are you ready to change your story? Change your life? Contact him today. For coaching, he can be contacted at [email protected]. He also practices functional medicine for chronic foot and ankle pain at The Chronic Foot Pain Center in NYC and Port Washington, L.I. (www.drrobertkornfeld.com). For foot and ankle medical problems, he can be contacted at [email protected].