Happiness is a beautiful subject to explore as it is the inner longing of every human heart: How to be happy! But Life is full of problems! Happiness comes mainly from our perspective on life. Satisfaction is what we make of it by our attitudes toward life and the habits we create and the choices we make.
The bread that looks like a stone:
Life’s greatest lessons usually come from our deepest trials! Our most significant victories come from our defeats. Making mistakes and learning from it and do better next time. Happiness comes when we understand this principle and become grateful for even our difficult times, problems, errors, and the lessons that shape our character to make us what we are.
Troubles are the tools by which we grow.
We need to remember that the darkest hour has only 60 minutes! “ Is not what happens to us, but how we react to what happens to us.” In other words, we are responsible for our happiness and the way we choose to react to what life brings our way.
The past and the future:
To find peace of mind that leads to happiness, we need to learn to forget the past and not to worry about the future. Both situations are a waste of time as we cannot change the past, and we cannot predict the future. By learning to do that, we find the path to greater joy in our lives. Sometimes it is better to embrace the present, life is now, today!
Myths of Happiness:
To be always happy: This is an impossible task! Life has its share of good and bad times, and we need to learn to be grateful for both.
Being rich and buying all that we want: We all know that material things do not bring total happiness. Wealth is just a tool you can use, but like the Beatles sung: Can’t buy me, love! You can’t buy happiness with money, only momentary pleasure, that is soon gone.
The end of the road: Thinking that when we have that, get there, achieve this, or accomplish that, we would be happy. It is the process that makes life worthwhile and brings the highest satisfaction. It is not what we get or have, but what we become in the process that’s important.
Our ability to control our happiness is real; to accomplish this, we could:
- Find meaningful work.
- Make the right choices in our everyday life.
- Create the right habits.
- Be more optimistic and positive.
- Learn to enjoy the moment, noticing the good around us.
- Be genuinely grateful for what we have — and expressing that gratitude.
- Have self-confidence.
- Nurture good relations with our loved ones.
- Feel hopeful with a sense of purpose.
- Have goals to attain and impossible dreams to achieve.
- Understand that it is more blessed to give than to receive.
- Be kind.
- Have empathy and be more understanding of others.
- Volunteer for worthy projects.
- Learn to control our negative emotions such as anger, envy, jealousy.
- Have good physical health: exercise and proper nutrition.
- Have happy and positive rituals and routines.
- Love learning and improving ourselves.
- Have the right perspective of things.
- Be brave and willing to take risks.
- To learn persistence and the ability to finish what we start.
- Be honest with ourselves and others.
- Have enthusiasm in our life.
- Love ourselves and others.
- Develop our social intelligence and soft skills.
- Learn to work in teamwork.
- Be Fair.
- Be good leaders, or good followers, caring for those we work.
- Be able to forgive.
- Avoid pride and selfishness.
- Take the time to think before we do.
- Learn to see good and beauty in people and situations.
- Laugh! Have a good sense of humor.
- Understand that Prayer, Meditation, mindfulness are essential.
- Have Curiosity and creativity.
There is so much more, but this should be enough to get started to create happiness in our lives.
Misunderstandings:
One misunderstanding is that we associate happiness with things, people, or achievements. But we need to realize that all these bring us only fleeting moments of pleasure. We learn to associate happiness with people or events. The problem with that is that your satisfaction is depending on external factors and usually you have no control over them, so when this fails, you have great sorrows.
Comfort foods:
Now, if you have a sweet tooth, your idea of happiness is chocolates and sweets drinks, but again, when you depend on that, you are confusing pleasure with happiness. Desires come and go and will never bring lasting happiness.
It doesn’t mean that you should not have pleasure; remember that it is just a sensation that passes on fast. Inner happiness, on the other hand, can be experienced regardless of your situation, as long as you live in the moment and stay positive. Then even during difficult times, you can remain content and happy with your life.
Loneliness:
Loneliness is a perfectly natural feeling; it’s usually temporary and can exist along with your inner happiness. We need to learn to accept it sometimes, instead of thinking we always need to be with people doing something.
We need to be selective with whom we spend time. The money you can earn or borrow, but the happiness you cannot take from another, the place to find it is within yourself.
Vitin Landivar