Nothing bad ever happens to you.
Yes.
You heard me right.
I don’t care if you got fired from a job, broke up with your significant other or even almost died..!
I stand by my statement.
Nothing bad ever happens to you.
Woah, Woah, Woah. I know what you are thinking…
But before you bombard me with all the reasons why you think I am wrong…
Give me a few minutes to hear me out.
I’ll explain what I mean.
First, let’s dive into what exactly something bad happening to you means.
What exactly is “bad”?
Take a moment and think about what absolutely makes something that happens in your life considered”bad”?
Like concretely “bad”?
….
Got it?
If you really took the time to think about that question, you might come to realize that nothing is black and white in the world of emotions.
All your experiences, good or bad, is open for interpretation.
You decide and give meaning to what happens to you.
The same exact thing can happen to two people and the meaning of interpretation of what happened will both be different.
Robert Glover, a world-renown psychologist, gives an example of what I mean in his book, “No More Mr. Nice Guy”
In one section, he introduced a concept that resonated with me ever since I read it.
What if it was a gift?
Glover states that no matter what happens to you, good or bad, rationalize how what happened to be a positive gift. Perceive the events in your life as blessings instead of infamy.
Let’s say you got fired from your job.
What if it was a gift?
Now, you have the freedom to explore other careers or opportunities that you may be more passionate about or like doing. Maybe the next job you get will pay more and be more fulfilling.
Significant other dumped you?
What if it was a gift?
Now, the pain you felt from the loss of the relationship motivated you onto a path of self-improvement. You gained better experience on what you want in a partner, you are grateful for the laughs or memories you spent with your ex-partner and you know it saved you time because you two were not right for each other.
Or it could be something you did.
Maybe you are a legal representative that hid important case information from your clients. This impacted the results of the case negatively. Your client hires a concealment attorney and makes you pay for your unethical behavior.
What if it was a gift?
Maybe this experience will make you really consider the ethics of what you are doing so you do not make the same mistake again in the future. The pain and embarrassment you feel from this experience will push you to be more morally outstanding.
Again, in the world of emotions, nothing is black and white. If events happen in your life, and they are open for interpretation, why take from your experiences a perception of negativity and unpleasantness?
In 2015, I got hit by a car while pushing my broken down car on the freeway. I broke my jaw, collarbone, nose and was hospitalized in an intensive care unit for a month. One of my good college friends even received an incomplete spinal injury that left him unable to walk…
I was physically and mentally scarred.
As dejected as I was, I told myself that this event in my life was a gift.
And it was.
Going through this horrific encounter really made me appreciate how transient this life is and that tomorrow is not guaranteed. Any of us can be taken at any moment. I have a true appreciation for life now.
I owe a lot to the speed of my recovery to the perspective change I took.
Start Today
Next time something that feels bad happens in your life, take a moment and ask yourself: what if it was a gift?
No matter how dismal or disoriented you feel, ask and rationalize to yourself how what happened to you was a blessing.
Instead of painting yourself as a victim, with this method, you will start to see just how blessed you are 🙂