Dr. Whitney Gordon-Mead quote on success

What is your definition of success?

If you’re anything like me…

If you’re an accomplisher… 

If you’re a high achiever…

Then you thrive on challenges and getting results. By the time I was 24, I was a successful financial advisor and, shortly after that, became my company’s youngest branch manager. My life was the adventure of constantly attaining higher goals and making more money than the men in my field. 

Like a horse with blinders, I was completely focused on what was ahead, what I could get done, and the next milestone to conquer so I could receive the attention I craved. With each new achievement came another surge of adrenaline, my mind sent out signals of gratification, triggering dopamine sensors, and encouraging happiness. 

Yet the recognition and the highs were short-lived, so I constantly needed another “success” fix. Because each new accomplishment rewarded me with the feeling of success and, therefore, happiness. However, the relationship between success and happiness is more complicated than merely an action gratified by a feeling. 

Is your happiness driven by an ongoing series of one-time successes? 

If the foundation of your happiness is ongoing achievement, it may be time to delve into what will bring you long-lasting happiness. 

There are three basic types of happiness: pleasure, passion, and purpose. Pleasure gives you an instant reward such as a tasty meal or a great song. Although pleasure is important to your well-being, it doesn’t provide long-term joy. Passion comes from being part of something you love – creating art, participating in a group activity, or enjoying your favorite sport – and can bring more consistent joy. The third type of happiness is purpose. To have a purpose is to find greater meaning in your existence. This can evoke a deep sense of fulfillment and an innate feeling of joy.

When happiness is based on the rush of excitement from accomplishment, it provides pleasure yet not necessarily passion or purpose. When that moment of happiness is over, you must move on to the next accomplishment, then the next after that to continue to feel happiness. There are more effective and longer lasting ways to find happiness. When you expand beyond the inclination to check boxes, a deeper and more meaningful sense of happiness will emerge. 

As you redefine what success means for you, incorporate all three types of happiness into your journey. Pleasure may be the only type of happiness gained from what you currently consider “success”. When you shift your definition of success to include passion and purpose, you will possess a roadmap to true happiness. 

Evoke passion and purpose in your life by redefining your idea of success.

Step #1 – Categorize

Separate your life into categories. I consider the foundational Fs: faith, family, friendships, finance, fitness, fulfillment, and fun. Choose those that are most predominant in your life or use them all. You may even find that as you look at these categories, there’s some overlap.

Some examples:

Fitness 

Eating habits, exercise, and care for your mind and body.

Finance/Career 

How you earn and manage your money. 

Family/Friendships 

How you manage your relationships. 

Faith/Fun 

How you support and care for your spirit.

Step #2 – Create new goals 

Create new goals for these categories that include passion and purpose.  

This could look like:

Fitness/Health 

Joining a sports team or group activity with friends or coworkers. Being part of a group will ignite passion towards your health goals.  

Finance/Career 

Pursuing additional education and expanding your expertise to get a raise, a promotion, or to become an entrepreneur doing something you truly love and with greater purpose.      

Family/Friendships

Putting more energy into deepening your relationships allows you to experience greater passion and supports your emotional needs. 

As you redefine your goals to include passion and purpose, your idea of success may change form. This shift in perspective can provide you with a roadmap to happiness. However, redefining success may not necessarily be a smooth ride. Whenever you make changes, it’s not unusual to experience challenges or setbacks.  

As you define your new meaning for success you may notice…

Obstacles

Look at obstacles as opportunities to grow and build upon your passion for change. 

Detours

Redefining what success means to you may lead down a road with twists and turns. It may mean a shifting in direction to explore different areas and try new ideas before one feels right. 

Comparison or judgment

Just because someone else appears happy in their success doesn’t mean you’ll be happy with what they have. Stay focused on yourself without judgment and release the desire to compare your journey with others. 

Success looks different to each individual. What matters most is that your definition of success brings you joy. As you uplevel your goals to include passion and purpose, your idea of success may change form and provide your roadmap to true happiness. To receive my top 8 strategies for increasing your happiness, click here for my new Tip Sheet: 8 Simple Strategies for Greater Passion And Purpose.

Author(s)

  • Dr. Whitney Gordon-Mead

    Speaker, Certified Life Coach, Ordained Minister

    Intuit Wisdom, LLC

    About Dr. Whitney Gordon-Mead:   I sold my successful financial planning business and founded Intuit Wisdom so I could help successful, high-achieving women enjoy their success without sacrificing their health, wellbeing, relationships, and dreams.   As an International Speaker, Certified Master Trainer, Certified Accelerated Evolution Coach, Spiritual Counselor, and Ordained Minister, I’ve coached and counseled powerful professional women, business owners, and executives worldwide to experience physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual balance.   Amidst my three+ decades of research and experience, leading up to my doctoral degree in metaphysics, I was able to heal from fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, post-traumatic stress disorder, and burnout. As a result, I designed a system for accelerated wellbeing that is rooted in metaphysics. I now use this proven system to empower each client to align with her essential authentic self, master her own wellbeing, and experience greater freedom and fulfillment in all areas of life. From relationships, work, and finances to family, health, and quality of life - there are no limits! What’s unimportant falls away. Magic happens, synchronicity.   Living in South Florida with my husband, Dean (the love of my life), and my cat, Whimsy, allows me to do the things I love, like spending time outdoors, boating, relaxing on the beach, and hiking. I also enjoy concerts and musicals, reading, writing, traveling, and investing.   My dream is a world where every woman says “YES!” to herself. I believe that life is not meant to be endured; it IS meant to be enjoyed!