We all wish to live a happy life, we try our best to stick around people who make us happy, and people we make happy ourselves. Being happy, however, is not an easy task at all, we often show various signs of self-sabotaging behavior and after a while, we end up asking ourselves ‘’why do I sabotage my own happiness?’’. Not giving enough attention to our beloved hobbies, friends, and family, procrastinating and constantly looking for happiness in the wrong places in most cases, turns out to become self-sabotage depression that is certainly not an easy thing to deal with. In order to avoid sabotaging your own happiness, there are a few things you could do:

1. Stop Comparing Yourself To Other People Around You

If you are one of the people who continously compare their body, career success, relationships and personality to others around you, you will never really be able to be happy with your own self, you will never be satisfied with who you are as a person. Just because one of your acquaintances has more followers than you on Instagram, does not make them a better, more beautiful person at all. Be happy with who you are, accept your flaws and develop how you want to be, not how others make it seem cool. 

2. Quit Procrastinating

We are all found procrastinating at times, and at times, it can actually be a good thing. However, if you procrastinate for too long and your procrastination turns out to be longer than a few days, you will end up feeling useless, uncomfortable and most likely block your own happiness in the whole process. People who procrastinate a lot are usually those who never have their work done on time, they always make up excuses and are never truly happy with their progress. 

3. Hangout With Your Friends, Do Not Avoid Them

It is completely fine to want and be alone at times, however, you should not distance yourself from your friends too much. It is fine to refuse to go to a concert of a band you dislike, but you should not continuously refuse to meet up with your friends just because you assume things or feel like you do not need anyone around you. Humans are social creatures, we all love to have someone to talk to. 

4. Quit Constantly Fighting With Your Partner

If you are the one in the relationship who mainly always initiates arguments, you probably already know you are the reason your relationship might be failing. When things are going well, there is no reason for you to look for bad, there is no reason to get hooked on small, useless things and make a fight. Doing this, you sabotage your own happiness and your own relationship too. Your partner might be willing to listen to your complaints today and tomorrow, but eventually, you will probably reach the limit and soon, your complaints will no longer have any effect at all. The more you fight and complain about things, the less your partner will be able to do about it. 

5. Stop Trying To Be In Control Of Everything And Everyone Around You

Being in control can be fun at times, but it is certainly not something you should make your priority in life. We all like feeling appreciated and respected, however, you do not need to be in constant control over everything and everyone around you in order to feel respected and appreciated as you wish to be. Having unrealistic expectations for people around you will surely have a negative effect after a while. You will end up disappointed, possibly disliked by many and also very frustrated upon realizing you are not in control as you originally thought you would be.  

Our happiness does not start through someone else or something else, our happiness is something we ourselves must work on. If we are brainlessly looking for happiness by doing the wrong things in life, our happiness will probably never get a chance to shine and even if it does, it will quickly fade away. If you want to be happy and have the privilege of being in a happy relationship that you deserve, you must first learn how to love yourself and people around you, not their followers on Instagram, clothing or their cars.


  • Nataliya Stefanus is a lifestyle Enthusiast and a passionate lifestyle blogger. She's a fan of good food at local restaurants. She enjoys playing bollywall on the beach, reading and spending time with her friends.