What are you choosing?
How exciting that we have the choice to make this year whatever we want it to be. Like writing a new chapter in a book, you choose the settings, the themes and the characters. The choices are all yours.
Hopefully you have had some time to recharge and reset for the year ahead. It’s amazing what even a quick break can do as far as reflecting on what was and contemplating what will be.
Setting the scene for 2020
As I write this, I’m back on deck revived from a break down at the beautiful West Coast in Apollo Bay Victoria. Days of sunshine, waves, good food, afternoon reading, walks and much needed time to reconnect with myself, family and friends. I have always had a soft spot for Apollo Bay, it’s far enough from Melbourne that it still has that old-world charm of a fishing village where the mountains meet the sea.
Visits to Apollo Bay have been frequent for me, since I was 8 years old where my sister and I had weekends with my Dad, to when I was a Sales Manager with Mars based in Warrnambool and now where we spend many Xmas breaks as one family. The pier has hardly changed, new and old boats still rock up against the weathered timber and cray pots and ropes border the walkway just as I remember during childhood.
I’m not sure how long that will last as more and more developers encroach on building apartments and resorts and many new and funky cafes and shopping outlets are emerging. One thing I will say is Apollo Bay knows its boundaries as far as for what they stand for and what they will do to ensure they live their truth.
In May 2019, a proposed $70 million 180-room development in Apollo Bay was rejected with over 394 submissions opposing the plan and only 16 in its favour. The reason it was rejected was “the scale of the thing was disproportionate to the character and appeal of the town and it’s environment”. The town stood strong and with conviction and an aligned cause they have kept their town.
Boundaries
This gets me to thinking about how important is for us to set boundaries and really know what we stand for and what we don’t.
Brene Brown says “Boundaries are simply what’s ok and what’s not ok”.
To me boundaries are like the speed humps in the road, without them we can lose control and could end up anywhere.
To have 20/20 vision, a term most commonly used to express normal visual acuity measured at a distance of 20 feet, means you can see clearly at 20 feet what should normally be seen at that distance.
Not setting boundaries and adhering to them can set us way off course, can cause unnecessary pain, distort our path and can also influence others especially if you are leading, to follow suite. Having boundaries both personally and professionally helps you bring your whole self to whatever you do, clearly paves the way for success, helps you measure where things are and keeps things real and relevant.
Take the time to:
- Set boundaries and know your limits and what you do and don’t stand for.
- Build self-awareness of these boundaries
- Consider what has worked and what hasn’t in the past and present
- Measure them ongoing
- Get support to live by these
- Friends, work colleagues and family
- Clearly communicate what these are
- Let people know
Are your boundaries blurred?
A boundary that has become blurred for me, especially in 2019 was that of work life balance or what I call work life blend (more integrated and achievable). This is an area many of our clients find challenging and this is usually due from not setting clear guidelines of what you will and won’t accept. A boundary I have set is that I won’t (unless absolutely necessary) do work travel on a Sunday night and I won’t do 6am morning flights anymore. This will ensure I get my weekends not anticipating work travel from midday on a Sunday and by flying at night instead of early morning my energy is up and I’m more prepared to be in service to my clients the next day.
According to Gallup’s State of the American Workplace 2017, 53 percent of employees said that a role that allows them to have greater work-life balance is “very important” to them. Workplace boundaries help you achieve and safeguard balance in their area. This is a great example of a need to set boundaries both in and out of work as one supports the other.
Boundaries come in many forms and I’ve outlined 3 of the more obvious ones:
Physical
- This is all about your personal space and touch considerations.
- The rules you apply to this will define this for you and could include things such as handshakes vs hugs at work, where your desk is located and how and what you set up as your surroundings.
Mental
- Your thoughts, opinions and values are what will determine your mental boundaries
- Setting boundaries around your routine and how certain things may operate at work is an example of this. Be clear and adhere to the rules you set and avoid (when applicable) others ideas on influencing or changing this.
Emotional
- This is all about getting in touch with your feelings and emotions and setting boundaries around these can help you see the differences between those you have that are different to those around you at work.
- Knowing who and when to say yes or no to in relation to tasks can help you ensure you don’t allow others feelings and attitudes towards things influence your own attitudes and motivations.
Take the time as we head into the new year to reset your boundaries, let go of the ones that no longer serve you and create new rules of what you do and don’t accept.
What do you need to:
- Ignite
- Extinguish
- Maintain
As always, I would love to hear your thoughts
Lead to be limitless this year!