The Holidays can be a time of joy and celebration, but can also be a time of challenge, especially for those with substance addiction in early recovery, and for those that love them.
There are pros and cons to the Holidays for those in recovery during the Holidays.
On the cons side, the Holidays can be a struggle due to:
- Unresolved work, friend and family issues that progressed during active addiction.
- Not being prepared for friend and family situations because “you got this” and don’t feel the need to engage a recovery support community.
- Setting boundaries with colleagues, friends and family that either don’t support recovery or don’t understand it can be challenging at a time where it is challenging just to show up without the social lubricant of drugs and/or alcohol.
On the pros side, the Holidays can be an opportunity to:
- Utilize a recovery support community to helps navigate work, friend or family Holiday situations before, during and after those challenging events.
- Begin the healing process of past Holiday trauma with family, friends or workplace relationships.
- Reinforce newly learned recovery-oriented coping strategies to walk through situations during the Holidays, where pre-recovery those uncomfortable situations would have been navigated by engaging in active addiction.
- Make a living amends to friends, family or in the workplace by showing them a newfound recovery version of themselves to experience, enabling being of service to and connecting with them in a meaningful way, re-writing old histories with building new hope filled relationships.
Everything Is Happening All At Once:
Often both the pros and cons listed above are all happening at once and it is best to consult with a recovery support community about how and if to engage in work, friend and family Holiday events. Recovery peers and mentors, therapists, counselors, sober companions, sober coaches, and case managers are all great support for those in recovery; indeed, it takes a village, especially during the Holidays. It may feel like self-sufficiency and “pulling yourself up by the bootstraps” to go it alone and “tough it out” are what’s best, but often a sober support community can help to give the much needed feedback that the “easier softer way” is actually to enlist, listen to and take suggested direction to walk through the Holidays in a new way that supports continued recovery.
The Holidays Are The Perfect Time To Begin Your Recovery!
Many struggling with substance addiction, especially those with chronic and acute addiction, begin their recovery during the Holidays. They think this is the worst possible time to enter recovery or that it isn’t possible, but this could be the best possible time for this opportunity to happen. It is a matter of perception and perspective. It is hard to see what a building looks like when pressed up against a building, but when it is viewed from across the street what the entire building looks like becomes clear. The person entering recovery is consumed and obsessed with the “crisis of the moment” that has become the trigger point of them beginning their recovery during the Holidays, either for the first time or hopefully the last time of many previous attempts. Being willing to seek out, listen to and take direction from a sober support community in this moment of desperation can help put all the events that lead to this recovery on the shelf long enough to build a resilient foundation in recovery. Once that foundation is built, then anything can be walked through in recovery collaboratively with a recovery support community at their side. Either nothing can take someone out of their recovery or anything can, depending on their willingness and desperation to have a new experience through their consistent action. Surrender is often perceived as weakness, but in this instance it can be a tremendous source of strength that leads to saying “yes” when the answer had always previously been “no” to the essentials of recovery suggested by a sober support community.
Whatever has lead to recovery during the Holidays, there is no better time to wholeheartedly engage in it. The consequences of recovery will never be worse than the consequences of continued substance addiction. The easier softer way is remaining in recovery and finding the willingness to go to any lengths to change. The gift of recovery is the best one you can give to yourself and those you love this Holiday Season.