Learning something new is tiring. Continuing to learn something new or to change makes you constantly rethink whether you really want to do it. Is it your own agenda, or is it someone else’s plan imposing it on you?
Change is difficult. It requires a solid will and openness to new things. Both of these experiences activate the body’s stress system. Technically, this also activates the Sympathetic Nervous System (i.e. SNS or stress). Stress is actually not a bad thing. You may need some stress to wake up in the morning. However, too much stress negatively affects life in many ways. The additional burden caused by the many annoying stress episodes you experience throughout the day is the biggest cause of the extreme stress you experience. This results in cognitive, emotional, and perceptual impairment and puts your immune system in jeopardy.
The biggest danger is losing the motivation to be open to learning new things. When we feel this annoying stress too much, we start to take away from ourselves. We do not notice what our competitors, colleagues at work or our spouse or partner are doing. We are locked into rigid ways of thinking (and seeing the world around us that way) that reduce our ability to adapt.
When stress becomes active, we release three endocrines (hormones that are also neurotransmitters). Epinephrine and norepinephrine help you prepare for a fight or flight by transporting blood from capillaries that are not needed for survival to the blood vessels in the large muscle groups in your arms or legs. Cortisol gets into your bloodstream. It acts quickly to reduce activity in your immune system while doing some useful things like protecting muscles from injury. However, it also limits neurogenesis (the transformation of neural stem cells into new neurons). This means that your environmental vision is severely restricted, your exposure to people is limited, and your cognitive abilities are compromised.
Learning something new is tiring. Continuing to learn something new or to change makes you constantly rethink whether you really want to do it. Is it your own agenda, or is it someone else’s agenda imposing it on you? If someone else is trying to help you as a friend, coach or manager and interferes with what you really want outside of normal life and work, we call it “compassionately coaching“. Unfortunately, most of the time, people try to help us, even in good faith, by imposing what we do, how we should change, and their own will. We call this “coaching for compliance”.
Coaching for fit is like making a decision to exercise more with the new year. This decision gradually shifts from “I want to be more fit” to “I will be in shape when I find time”. Your priorities change and the effort to change over time turns into guilt and a vague memory.
However, if you spend your time with someone, formally or informally, compassionately coaching, you help them be open to learning, change and renewal! You can do this during a coffee break or lunch, or even during a conversation that creates a feeling of hope, gratitude or happiness.
Practical Suggestions for Renewal
Here are some ways to activate your desire for renewal while at home:
1. Do meditation, yoga or tai chi three times a week, with a minimum of 20 minutes per session;
2. Take a walk in the forest or nature;
3. Play games with your kids (real games not violent video games) or have fun with your cat / dog
4. Ask your family members to tell funny stories during the meal that make you all laugh.
Emotional contagion can benefit you. We get the positive or negative emotions of others about stress or renewal within a thousandth of a second. Encouraging self-renewal in another person also triggers change within you!
Here are some ways to awaken self-renewal in working life:
1. Even at a coffee break, you can ask people some questions and talk about their answers: “What would it look like in the perfect life you dream of reaching in 10-15 years?” Or with a more fun version, “How would your job or life change if you made $80 million from the lottery after taxes? “
2. At lunch or after work, at the cafe / bar chat, ask your colleagues, “Who has helped you the most in forming your own personality throughout your life?” Ask the question. Right, this is the question, “What do you think of last night’s football game?” very different from the question. But that’s actually the intention.
In addition, two more important practical tips:
1. It is much better to do this in smaller doses each day rather than wait for long time-consuming opportunities to address the issue of regeneration. For example, periodic breaks of 10-15 minutes during a working day may be more beneficial than waiting for the free hour once or twice a week
2. It is better to change the type of activity performed than to do the same or a limited number of activities over and over again.
In general, does your work week offer a range of these options (but not for stress but for regeneration)? Do you help others renew themselves?
Mohab Ayoub, CEO of Algedra