It’s not what people ask for, but it is absolutely what they want, and you don’t even need to wrap it. During this time of gift-giving, what if you included in your shopping list, not just presents, but presence? Simply being there for whomever you are lucky enough to share the holidays with – albeit, in person, zoom or over the phone. We are all so busy, so distracted, so pre-occupied with so many things this year, I believe we are in a presence deficit, and your presence just might be the thing that will fill up your loved ones with joy. Below are some easy, and powerful beautiful ways to gift your presence.
Who could you be present for?
Whom on your list would just adore your uninterrupted presence? Who in your family or circle of friends have you been challenged by or more distant from that you would like to deepen your relationship with? What if you set aside all of your expectations and history with this person. Put away whatever is open ended or wounded from the past and where fully present to whatever it is that comes up? As you prioritize your relationship with this person, and express that commitment through your presence, notice what happens as this person pours into the space you are opening up for them. Notice if you are able to pour more of yourself into them? See if you are experience something new between you emerging?
What could you be present to?
What could you be present to that might open up some possibilities for you and your loved ones to engage more deeply? Perhaps there was a particular struggle someone has been dealing with like a health issue? All of us have been stressed so much this year and are exhausted. If you were present to that, what would you do or be for your family? Is there someone that is in a new situation or chapter in their lives you know little about? What about investing in becoming aware of what their reality is like? Notice what you learn about them as you pepper them with questions. Notice how you feel as you see them unfold their narrative. Do you notice that your sensitivity to something another is experiencing is inviting a deeper connection to them and them to you?
What could you presence that’s needed?
What if you brought something into your holiday experience you are present to? You can presence anything you wish, and when you do, it makes it available for everyone. Do you wish to presence, joy, generosity, forgiveness or hospitality? The choices are endless and any of these things go well with whatever is being served for dinner. With this kind of presence, you have the power to change the nature of the conversation and deepen and make more meaningful the interactions that you have. This is one of those gifts, like the jelly of the month club, that just keeps giving. The best part is whatever you choose to presence will rub off on anyone you come into contact with. Watch the joy spread as you presence your loving energy.
You go first
The best part of offering your presence is that it costs very little but creates more impact than any physical present ever could. If you give fully to those you love, you get them and their love right back in return. Notice when their presence matches your presence! Unlike a present, that might have some temporal effect, presence is an investment that can span the lifetime of a relationship. And you don’t need a holiday to extend it, this is something you can gift anytime, anywhere for anyone. Have fun with it, mix your presence in with some of your favorite ingredients. Notice you can’t ever go wrong!