We cannot look anywhere without seeing violence and unrest. The 24/7 news cycle and endless sources of social media are an onslaught to the senses. In fact a 2020 Gallup study showed that, “Nearly 60% of Americans reported being “somewhat” or “very” concerned about the impact of current events on their job productivity.” Today’s leaders not only have to process this news personally and find ways to regulate their emotional responses, but also have to help their people perform through the distractions.
To make matters more challenging, technology and AI have changed work more in the last two years than the previous thirty. Many leaders experience feelings of helplessness due to an inability to directly meet the needs of employees facing internal and external stressors. According to Deloitte’s 2023 Well-being @ Work study “only 42 percent of managers say they feel “completely” empowered and capable of helping their company achieve its wellbeing commitments.” There is, however, hope for leaders seeking to assist employees with seemingly impossible situations.
Compassion is the way to improve leaders’ sense of efficacy when entering difficult conversations with employees.
Compassion is empathy plus action. Adam Grant (2023) states that the key to handling work challenges outside of a leader’s direct control is to respond with compassion rather than empathy, “focusing not on sharing others’ pain but on noticing their feelings and offering comfort.” Caring about employees is paramount to successful leadership, but without the action component, it just doesn’t translate.
You may be thinking that if compassion requires two skills, empathy and action, why not just focus on empathetic leadership?
Great question! Empathy according to Merriam-Webster is “the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another.” Experiencing the feelings of others without taking action requires an enormous cognitive load with very little payoff. Studies show that people tend to avoid situations where empathy costs time and money, but also when there is cognitive distress (Andreoni, Rao, & Trachtman, 2017; Cameron & Payne, 2011; Pancer, McMullen, Kabatoff, Johnson, & Pond, 1979; Shaw, Batson, & Todd, 1994). When considering the choice to show empathy (yes, most of us have a choice), we will often consider the proximity of the individual to our inner circle, and our ability to make any appreciable difference in this persons’ life.
The lines between work and personal life have blurred, leading employees to want more congruence between their lives in and out of work. With companies working to increase inclusivity, we often hear and see the phrase, “bring your full self to work,” but when leaders aren’t ready to have difficult conversations or conflict, best intentions can leave people feeling othered.
Workplace policy issues, family challenges, illness, burnout, layoffs, etc…can be intimidating, and many leaders will avoid the conversations entirely, but the benefit for listening to an employee’s needs can far exceed the perceived risk of these discussions. And, while leaders may not be able to directly solve an employee’s challenge, they can listen, acknowledge, and take action to help their people.
Here are examples of compassion in action that all leaders can utilize:
- Know what resources the company offers and share when appropriate: All this step requires is the willingness to learn and a little bit of research. In larger organizations there is typically some form of People Resources Hub or Benefits Portal. New solutions like The Wellist go so far as to tie in community resources that are available to employees.
If you work for a smaller employer, understanding company benefits and their component parts can be trickier, but setting aside 30 minutes with a Benefits or HR professional can go a long way to preparing for quality conversations with employees.
- Help employees prioritize overwhelming schedules: One of the biggest gifts a leader can provide their people is asking directly “how the employee is managing to prioritize their responsibilities?” This question opens the door for a direct report to admit where they are challenged at the moment. Managers should also ask employees to share their top 3 priorities at least once a month to ensure alignment between the direct report’s work and the requirements of the role.
Let’s face it, we do not get taught how to manage an overly busy schedule in school. That, coupled with the fact that busyness is rewarded in our 24/7 culture leaves little room for prioritizing personal needs and well-being. By reviewing calendars, leaders can impart the importance of scheduling focus time for deep work, breaks for well-being, and time for critical work priorities.
- Being aware of leave and PTO policies and sharing the details when needed: I can’t tell you the number of calls I received in my former role where leaders sought more information about our policies after an employee asked. While it is always preferable to admit you don’t know something and return with correct answers later, it is so much more helpful to be able to aid an employee in their moment of need. Similar to the first tip, all this requires is a willingness to learn and 30 minutes of time to review policies.
- Scheduling more frequent, higher quality check-ins to make sure employees have the support they need: At least once a month leaders should have well-being checks with their people. That means alongside development conversations and regular work discussions there needs to be space to review employee well-being and ascertain what if any resources a leader can provide.
These conversations aren’t rocket science and only require that the leader ask direct questions like, “how is an employee really doing?” and “if they are able to find time to prioritize their well-being?” All that is left is to close our mouths and open our ears. If as a leader you learn about internal or external stressors and do not have a direct solution, the obligation is to acknowledge the employee and offer approved company resources where possible.
- BONUS Super Proactive compassion in action tip: Hold a core values workshop with your team! Core values workshops are a staple in the offerings of Organizational Psychology professionals. Great workshops typically take about 1.5 hours and help employees work to identify their individual core values. Once we are aware of our people’s core values, we are better prepared to meet needs with compassion in action and to help them see the connection between individual and company values.
Leading with compassion is game changing for leaders, individual contributors, and the organizations they support. With just a little proactivity and strong listening skills, employees feel seen and leaders will feel more efficacious in handling employee needs. Compassionate leadership is truly a win-win.