In many cases, the news of a divorce can come as a surprise and it can be disappointing. You might have been together for several years, and quite naturally, just expected to grow old with them. More than likely, they are adamant about the divorce, and unwilling to change their mind. Whatever the case, learning how to accept a divorce is very important to your mental and emotional health. Working as a top rated divorce lawyer in Bergen County New Jersey, here are three ways I have witnessed some clients accept the fact that your future ex-spouse wants a divorce:

Behave Respectfully Toward Your Spouse

The ability to still be able to show respect toward your spouse during this process speaks volumes. It exhibits strength, resiliency, and sets the tone for how you will conquer other issues that might arise later. If you have private issues with your spouse, do not make public broadcasts about those issues. Refrain from posting your frustrations on social media for the entire world to see (and judge you). Speak to your partner privately, and work out your differences with each other. Behaving respectfully toward each other will help to make the divorce process operate more seamlessly for both parties involved.

Become Your Best Self

After the divorce is final, make every effort to become a better version of yourself. The divorce may have scarred you emotionally. Remember, your feelings are valid. However, do not sulk too long. Learn the lesson(s) from the experience, heal your heart, and tap into the true essence of yourself. In some marriages, a spouse can “lose” themselves in the everyday duties, roles, and responsibilities that being married entails. Now that you are a newly single person, you have time to explore new things, rediscover yourself, and do things that make you happy.

Stay Busy

An idle mind is the devil’s playground. After you’ve come to terms with accepting the divorce, please be cognizant of whom you choose to spend time with. Keep a circle of positive and trusted friends and family in your corner. They should be able to keep you uplifted and plan activities to get you out of the house. Be aware of how you’re spending your time alone. Are you watching sad movies on Netflix or Lifetime, or are you reading books to strengthen a skill that you’ve been developing? While it’s important to stay busy, you must be aware of how you’re spending your time also.

In closing, receiving news about a divorce can be damaging to one’s ego and can take an emotional toll on them. However, it is critical to treat your partner with respect, become a better version of yourself after the divorce, and stay busy thereafter. By keeping these three things in tact, you are on your way to fully accepting the divorce and moving on with your life in a positive direction.


This article contains general information and opinions from Sheena Burke Williams and is not intended to be a source of legal advice for any purpose. No reader of this article should act or refrain from acting on the basis of information included in this article without seeking legal advice of counsel. Sheena Burke Williams expressly disclaims all liability with respect to actions taken or not taken based on any content in this article.