A couple hugging

Can we all agree Number 4 is a no-brainer?

It’s the big V day coming up, and I don’t know about you but I’ve seen tons of content already — Gift and activity idea articles, videos, Ads, and what have you. To see some of these things, you’d almost forget the world is still battling the Covid-19 pandemic. The hype is so intense that actor Timini Egbuson suggested a 24-hour Lockdown on February 14 because we might just have numbers skyrocketing with all the activities and events being planned. But while there’s no want of Valentine gift ideas and the whole shebang, there’s hardly any resources on what NOT to do on this widely accepted Day of Love.

You might get a high from the envious looks on your colleagues’ faces, but you’re gonna come crashing down just as quickly.

I’m an avid consumer of rom-coms and romance novels, and I also have a significant other. But I’ve always been somewhat cynical (weird, I know) and when I thought about writing a Valentine’s Day article, the thought of another “5 romantic things to do” piece didn’t hold much appeal.

So, hey! If you’re looking for what NOT to do on Valentine’s Day, be you Single Pringle or Blissfully Boo’ed up, here’s a list.

1.Spend Time on Social Media

February 14 is the one day that even inactive social media accounts come alive. Not everyone is an influencer who can afford to pump the ‘Gram with scenic photos every day, so on rare occasions — like Valentine’s — when they do go somewhere or do something Instagram-worthy, you can be sure there’ll be pictures, videos, and heart-melting (or envy-inducing) captions. Two reasons why you should avoid or reduce the time you spend on social media on the 14th — One, if you’re single, there’s the possibility of slipping into self-pity with all the declarations of love and romantic gestures you see. Two, if you are in a relationship, you might find yourself holding up your partner’s efforts against others, and that never ends well. Trust me, I’ve seen the over-the-top stuff people are pulling out there just to ask another to be their Val, so I know what I’m talking about. It’s not hating, it’s protecting your mental health and your relationship.

2.Accept a Date Just Because…

One of the worst things you could do on Valentine’s Day is going on a blind or pity date. Meeting someone for the first time can be tasking all on its own, what with the expectations from both sides and the judging of every gesture. Now, you don’t want to have to deal with all that on a day you’re likely to be surrounded by giddy lovers. Imagine a man popping the big question and his lady bursting into rapturous delight as you wonder why your own date just ordered for the two without asking your preference? Ouch.

3.Call or Text Your Ex

Abort mission! Abort mission! Honestly, there’s hardly any scenario where this ends well. Being without a SO* on Valentine’s can be tough, especially if you only recently broke up. Thoughts of getting a cuddle or Netflix-and-chilling with that special someone are likely to fill your mind; it’s a vulnerable time. But it’s also the worst time to call or text your ex. They can go down the road with you and say how much they miss you two together. Then, you spend Valentine’s Day, but things get awkward on February 15. Another scenario: They don’t feel the same way you do and their life without you is actually pretty great. This leaves you crushed. Three, they’re in a new relationship and you make things awkward not just for you and them, but for the new person. Four — and possibly the most agonizing: They don’t return your calls or acknowledge your texts. Bottom-line is, if you’re going to try getting back with your ex for whatever reasons, February 14 is not the day to do it.

4.Stuff Your Relationship down Everyone’s Throats

I hate to come off as a Debbie Downer, but Valentine’s Day is hardly the day to brag non-stop about the love of your life or supply the world with endless intimate details that end up getting cringe-y. It’s enough that some of your single friends may feel obligated to double-tap your lovey-dovey posts. Don’t then be tempted to supply details of your V-Day plans during lunch at work or in school.

5.End a Relationship

Except you didn’t see it coming and your SO did something so hideous on Valentine’s Day, it is not the right time to break up with someone. Don’t be that girl that holds off the bad news from her man because she doesn’t want to be alone or without gifts on February 14. It sounds very diabolical, but I have heard of people waiting for Valentine’s Day and getting their gifts before breaking up with their partners. Be better, please.

6.Moan about Your Single Status

Truth is, the world has far bigger problems than someone’s lack of romance and you’re only going to come off as a nuisance if you choose Valentine’s Day to bemoan your fate publicly. This ties back to number 1 on this list. If you’re single, the more time you spend on social media, the more you’re tempted to pity yourself and just let the world feel your pain! It’s a bad idea, and it’s not any better if you do the complaining in real life either.

7.Treat Yourself and Let a Non-existent Person Take Credit

I get it. Even the toughest of us can get all mushy when a surprise delivery team turns up at work or wherever with cakes and trumpets and the whole nine yards. But PLEASE, do not think about sending one to yourself and then gasping in surprise as you read a swoon-worthy note from your ‘love.’ Sure, you might get a high from the envious looks on your colleagues’ faces, but you’re gonna come crashing down just as quickly. Then, you’ll start to feel worse, not to mention all the other lies you’ll have to come up with to explain the disappearance of your ‘love.’ There’s nothing wrong with treating yourself. While a surprise delivery from yourself to yourself might elicit strange looks, you can treat yourself to a sumptuous dinner and some quality entertainment at home.

*SO — Significant Other