I cannot help but to think to myself that I have been unconsciously preparing myself for social confinement for years. This urging need to be alone, to recharge myself, to distance myself from the outer world and it´s noise has many times made me feel there was something wrong with me. I was one of those people who would turn down and invitation for an outing with friends to spend time with myself. As strange as that sounds, it felt right. There wasn´t anything wrong with me after all. I simply enjoy my own company. I have learned quite awhile ago to do things for myself and enjoy them. Travelling by myself was certainly one of the most liberating experiences I have ever felt. My first trip was to Barcelona city, in Spain and I can recall vividly watching an Opera and Flamenco show at a theatre on Las Ramblas and feeling powerful for doing it on my own. After that trip travelling on my own became a regular choice in my life.
Although travelling is definetely out of the question now, there are other habits that I created that prepared me for this current worldwide event. Cooking a delicious dish for myself and opening that special wine bottle just for me was another one of those things that I think everyone should do. With no guilt associated. Afterall we should treat ourselves the same or better that we treat others. I love to pamper myself. Meditating, reading, watching personal development videos and or workshops have long ago become my daily mental and emotional higiene. Without them, this current experience would definetely be more challenging.
A couple of days ago I stepped out to go to a supermarket and during normal times what would be an extremely busy street in Lisbon, seemed like a ghost town. I walked a 10 minute distance and came across no one. This should have scared me, but it didn´t. Because I know, I feel deeply that everything humanity is going through has a higher purpose. Trusting this higher purpose has brought me much peace and tranquility.
What has this experience taught me about myself and my life:
- I am so much stronger and independent that I ever thought I was.
- I want people in my life. Although I may feel that I don´t need them we all need people in our lives. They add value. I have amazing people in my life who during these challenging times and who knew that I was alone reached out and asked “How are you doing?”. This small action has meant a lot to me.
- My daily habits of meditation, reading, and overall feeding my mind and soul have been the strongest tools of survival. Investing in myself has been one of the wisest choices I have made.
- I will be just fine. I will embrace whatever comes my way with acceptance, determination and faith.
- Giving into fear will never be an option for me. I will always choose LOVE. Love for myself and others.