One of my closest friends recently discovered that he had stage 4 cancer, and that he likely has about two years to live, if he uses chemo aggressively. If I was in his situation, I”m not sure what I would do; I suspect I’d get terribly depressed and sit in in my house, wondering why this was happening to me.
My friend, by contrast, is doing an amazing job of planning, and experiencing, a wonderful period of his life. He has worked hard to rebuild his relationship with his teenage kids, and they are doing really well. He pulled some money out of the stock market and is taking them on wonderful trips. He is also flying to countries and experiences he’s always wanted to have with his girlfriend. Most importantly, his attitude is amazing; he projects hopefulness even while knowing the end is near, and is always upbeat and engaged in life. He makes more of an effort than ever to ask about his friends’ lives, to show interest in their inner world, and avoids using his friends as bereavement counselors.
I don’t know how long he can keep this up, but he is an inspiration. There are many ways to face imminent death; his is the most impressive I’ve ever seen.
When my time comes, I hope I can be half as brave and upbeat as he was.