In my last article https://community.thriveglobal.com/stories/where-do-i-begin-with-self-healing/ I shared with you how you can simply start by addressing your most basic of needs to set you off on your self-healing journey, the journey that will eventually lead you to self-actualisation, and true happiness!
Once you have addressed your basic needs it is only then that you will be able to truly focus on the next step of your journey, your safety & security needs. Security refers to the stability of your future. To heal this area of your life you simply need to get rid of that which will not last and keep or build that which will. It is evident that we as humans know to do this when you witness someone who is having their ‘a-ha’ moment in life effortlessly cutting out situations and people that no longer offer any value to their life. In doing this they create room for better experiences to move in. Subsequently, they often end up filling this space with hobbies and adventures that they’ve ‘always wanted to do’ and meeting new like-minded people etc. Maybe it was after a big, life-changing event like a relationship break-up or it may even be labeled as something life a ‘mid-life crisis’, whichever, we have all seen people who pick themselves up and reinvent their lives, and though there may be a wave of heavy emotions related to the leaving-go part, when that is dealt with it is beautiful to then see someone ‘come into their own’.
Of course there are stepping stones that we use in life to get to the next stage we want to be and that is fine itself, that is part of making your long-term goals sustainable, they serve their purpose. But most people, for various reasons, hold on to so much in their lives,including people, objects, habits and emotions, that do not serve any purpose and therefore are not sustainable in a healthy lifestyle. Consider today in your life what is sustainable and what is not and don’t be afraid of leaving go of what is not good for you.
Safety is the other half of this level of healing and goes hand in hand with security as, your safety needs to be secure to be sustainable in a healthy life. The safety in your immediate surroundings and living area obviously takes priority, ensuring that you are somewhere where you know you can live unharmed and well. But, it is the feeling of safety that we have inside us that people often forget to nurture. We all desire this safety, it develops within us, while we are still in the womb, and we desire it until the day that we die. It is where addressing past traumas comes into play in healing – a lot of people start off here without addressing their basic needs first, but, like a pyramid, each level needs to balance on the last for stability.
From personal experience I recommend a mix of Talk Therapy as well as Energy Healing, my two favourites being 1. Reiki and 2. a form of Kinesiology that helps you to release emotions associated with past traumas. If these are therapies that you don’t yet feel you can invest in then just sit with yourself and a pen and paper and write down every thought that you have that is preventing you from feeling safe. Then ask yourself is it even your own belief? If it is, where did you learn this belief? Then explore the situation in question until you get to the bottom of where it came from and re-write the belief with a new mantra. For example your feeling of lack of safety may be coming from a thought such as ‘I will be physically punished if I upset someone in my life’, when you ask your if it is your own belief it may be, or it may be a belief you picked up from somebody else. Then you may explore situations that made you develop this belief. Then you can re-write this belief for example ‘I am no longer in a vulnerable place, and I am now living in a safe environment’. It may sound obvious but just acknowledging trapped emotions associated with negative beliefs can actually help to release them both. You may even notice some physical ailments being released too! This frees you up to feel safe again. In this feeling of safety you will naturally seek out situations that will reinforce your feeling of safety!
I would love to hear from anybody who attempts this simple exercise! Until the next article folks, stay well!