Right now is possibly the best moment to write about my dad.
Someone on Facebook, who really wants to be my friend (stalking much?), just posted in a requested message a poem about how we change from “daddy” to “dad” to “father” to “old man” the way we address our father.
And that poem, in the last line, has a request from father to son to say once more, at his grave, “I miss you, daddy” – the way he used to say when he was a little boy.
I cried – still do. I blocked that guy.
I realize that I’m so lucky to have a healthy, witty father in his 80s and I never imagined I’d call my dad “old man”.
It’s disrespectful, cold, and distant.
I learn so much from him. Every day.
And now I can’t continue writing…
I feel too much.
So I’m going to talk about my father, the strongest man I know. I know how much he loves taking care of me still. So I give him that, with my full heart.
What I learned from my dad is everything I know. Everything I am. Because even the things he didn’t know, he learned. He doesn’t stop learning, evolving, and THAT is the lesson.
That’s why I’m always learning something, I’m always in a course and I’m fascinated by learning, because he always told me that anything can be learnt. “If someone else could do it, you can do it too.”
The big lesson is that you can become whoever you need to become for your loved ones.
He dedicated himself to his family with dignity and grace, common sense and intelligence, sophistication and shooting from the hip.
When I immigrated to Canada, we were having conflicts – like any 30 year old who “stands by their principles” – and I believe that my move far away helped us both grow closer. Now, we talk online almost every day.
We had an attempt to live again in the same country.
I sponsored my parents and they stayed with me for just over 1.5 years, but they left. It didn’t feel bad when they did. In a way, I felt that they were growing weaker with me, far away from their roots. So I was happy to see them go back and stay strong. Become stronger.
They are well.
And now, I know that my duty is to be happy, because that’s what makes them happy and healthy for a long life full of laughter and warmth.
I’m here for you, daddy, being happy for both of us.
For the family that you and mom created out of nothing.
You didn’t have a dad of your own, and took all the best you’ve learned from others and created something that can rarely be found. Most people can’t believe how close our family is.
It’s an awesome reason for being labeled “a weirdo”.
Thank you for that, daddy!
I love you,
your little girl